Have you ever had that moment in your life where you keep having this gut feeling inside you that you might have said or done something in an inappropriate manner and ended up hurting someone who is essentially a person whom you don’t want to hurt?
You feel dead sure that something or the other is not right and that you yourself are at fault. Yet, not having the courage to take initiative, you keep brooding over the issue, waiting for things to clear by themselves and wishing that there’d be a sign, just one sign that everything has gone back to normal.
Believe me it takes a heck of a lot of nerve to do such a thing. But wait... let me finish.
Has it ever happened to you that you do exactly what I’ve typed, in the exact same sequence, and the reply that you get from that person is -“What? What the hell are you talking about?”
How would you react? I’d really like to know... not because I am keen on learning human behavioral patterns and other allied sciences. The reason behind me asking is simple- today was the day when I had that moment.
And I have to say, I was DUMBFOUNDED. I merely sat there, not knowing what exactly to clarify, having realized all of a sudden that the only person who wasn’t thinking clearly was “me” and that the entire misapprehension was inside my brain and no place else. Truly awkward I tell you.
But on a merrier note, I add that even though it eventually turned out to be a dud and I know now that I was plain stupid, the person in question was kind enough not to highlight this fact and instead he went on to say that I did the right thing in approaching him. What more, I’m relieved now that the supposed animosity never even really existed.
I’d rather like to be a fool, than being an intelligent man filled with doubt.
PS: I know how weird all this might seem coming from a person who two posts prior to this had declared so pompously that he does not like to share his emotions with anyone. I’m sorry for not having mentioned back there that I am also very moody and I’m now in one of those write-your-heart-out-until-you-feel-relieved moods.